Cocktails & Cardigans

Meet Parker, our 94 lb golden doodle (btw, the breeder tricked us and told us he would be between 65-75lbs... LIES)

Now before you say "aww" let me just share with you a little bit about this pup.

Chris and I got Parker a year or so before we were married, Chris was living in Boone, I was living in Greensboro and I would have visitation rights on the weekends (despite hysterical calls from Chris in the middle of the night when Parker would stay up crying only to go out and never use the bathroom, and then come back inside and pee all over the house), we were a happy little "family"

Cutest puppy EVER!

Fast forward a year, Chris and Parker move to Greensboro, Chris and I get engaged, buy a house, and get married.

Upon returning from the honeymoon, we realize Parker doesn't seem too pleased with us. At first we chalked this up simply to the fact that we boarded him for a few days (his first time ever at a kennel). 

However, things didn't get better, things started getting ugly. 

Everything that had anything to do with our wedding was getting destroyed by our precious "puppy."

First, Parker swallows my wedding earrings (yes I did dig through poo to find them, no I will not wear them again), then he chews up my new social security card and our marriage certificate.

But the icing on the cake was when I came home to find that Parker had DEMOLISHED my wedding gift to Chris, his beloved Costa Del Mar Sunglasses

RIP (good thing I paid extra for the lenses that would "last forever")

They were destroyed, completely unrepairable, and I cried, I cried hard. Honestly, I think my tears were the only thing that held Chris back from murdering our dog. The sentimental value of all of these items is irreplaceable, a dog isn't (kidding, sort of). The problem with Parker is, when he does something wrong, he knows it, and he gets EXTRA cute...

I'm sorry mom, I know I did wrong

So out of all of these incidents we've come to a conclusion. Parker doesn't support traditional marriage, he's more of a fan of the "alternative family" and I have to say, I like that about my little gigantic guy.